Yesterday was a nightmare...something you wouldn't even think of wishing it happens to you because it sure hurts BIG TIME. Even worse than a lesbian telenovela believe me.
Much has been said and much has been done on my part, and everything happened as it should happen. I don't regret being rude and bitter, that's really how i felt, and there's no way I'm gonna hide and deny it.
It felt like my chest was ripped open by an old, dirty and rusty knife. Then my heart was grabbed and taken out from my chest but still making sure the veins still connect to the rest of my body system. My heart itself was sliced by that cold, insensitive, selfish, devil-came-to-life woman, pricking and prying which part of my heart holds her, nurtures her. That part she eagerly removed and threw away to somewhere really far, somewhere i cannot reach or even see. She tried to bring every little piece together, poured alcohol to erase all possible marks, tried to sew it together using a big needle and a black string. And then she realized I was still alive, trying to grasp some air, as the tears endlessly rolled down my cheeks. On panic, the guilt slowly taking over her, she ran as fast as she can, leaving all traces and evidences, and left me, bruised and all.
I tried to stand, carrying my heart close to my chest. I realized I didnt know that woman at all. And I had this strange feeling that something was amiss, like there was a big hole in my heart.
Slowly, I am trying to put it all together, thinking hard about that woman and what she has probably done to me. A part of my brain still holds her, nurtures her, but it does not remember how it was, how it felt.
Only two things remain...the hole and the pain.
